Angel - birth poster

I thought for a long time about what to do with this angel birth poster. The subject matter around it touches me in so many ways.

Losing your own child is the greatest tragedy in life, and that's why talking about it feels difficult. Although I haven't experienced the greatest of sorrows myself, I've had to live with the thought during my twin pregnancy, when the prognosis for the girls' survival seemed very poor at times.

A multiple pregnancy is a risk, but it's also such a life-changing experience that many people seek out the company of others in a similar situation. Peer support has never been more important to me than when I was expecting our twins.

Even though the coronavirus epidemic isolated us mothers from each other, I was able to get to know wonderful people during my pregnancy and the first year of my baby, who were also expecting twins. Even during my pregnancy, we cheered each other on, met up and texted each other about how things were at home and from the hospital bed, where I spent several weeks.

Sometimes, however, fears become reality. A few weeks before my own children were born, I received devastating news about a little fighter. At that moment, I realized what a privilege it is to have a child. I realized that life is not always fair, that what was meant to be the happiest day in the world can turn into the greatest sorrow of life, with which you have to learn to live.

I often wonder how I would prepare myself for life with loss. How would I live alone with a twin if one of them didn't make it? What if the other's birthday was always overshadowed by the death of their sister...

Even though our story ended happily, the grief others face breaks my heart every time. Even though I don't know what it feels like to lose a child, I am grateful if I can bring even a small comfort to everyday life where sadness has been encountered.

The sisters' birth poster took on a new meaning when I was asked to design a poster with another baby with wings on its back. This work is perhaps the hardest I have ever done in my career. The angel birth poster was created with tears in my eyes, but it was still an extremely important work for me. I knew that it would bring comfort to its recipient, its message and meaning are more than a picture or a piece of paper.

When the picture of the baby angel was ready, I wondered how to react to it. Can it be published and can it be one picture among others? I had a discussion with many people. A doula encouraged me to publish the picture. She said that the death of a child is a part of many people's lives and should not be kept quiet about it. Every child born is forever a part of our lives - whether they are physically present or not. An angel - birth poster can be a way to tell a story to siblings, it can be a symbolic way to bring loss into everyday life or a permission for the viewer to open a conversation.

I cautiously presented the poster to a mother who I knew had experienced the loss of another twin. This mother confirmed to me what the doula had said that the poster should be published. This conversation led to a new commission/poster, whose story I was given permission to tell.

My family has a tradition of wishing my sister goodnight every night, her identical twin sister who passed away at the age of two days. The mother says that talking about the death of a child is often harder for those who have not experienced it themselves than for those who have had to experience it.

“The death of a child is life’s greatest tragedy, tearing the heart to shreds at its roots. There are no comforting words for that deep sadness. Many people are afraid to talk about it, lest they touch on a forbidden topic and bring their grief to the surface. But often those who have experienced the death of a child would like to talk about what happened, to talk about the angel as they would about their other children. Permission to talk helps, and over time, talking about the experience becomes easier. Grief is always present, but it changes its form.”

The mother also says that the family has a habit of remembering the angel sister on the twin's birthday alone. There is a photo, a candle and fresh flowers on the grave, and they visit the grave. It has already become a habit to buy identical helium balloons for the sisters and send one of the balloons to the edge of the clouds on their birthday. The twin sister is also involved in everyday activities and conversations. It has been important to the family that the angel is not a taboo that must be kept quiet. Now the three-year-old single twin has a habit of telling acquaintances and strangers that her sister is an angel who protects her. Now a joint birth poster of the angel and the single twin can be hung on the wall of the children's room.

So, the Angel birth poster has done its job if it comforts even one person. For this reason, it will also have a place in my online store in the future. You can learn more about our birth posters here .